Must be nice to be a Middleton sister. Living the high life, mixing with the great and good. You haven't done anything wrong that anyone can think of but people hate you for it anyway.
One has, according to the press, a nice bum, and that is now what she has been reduced to. A bum. Someone to look pretty and upstage brides. How dare she try and forge a career for herself writing books or columns or whatever else she may like to do under the glare of the world's paps. Pippa Middleton needs to know her place. She is a rearend, a bum, and anything she ever does other than show off her bum will be derided. Was anyone ever so despised for so little?
And her sister. Took her time to marry her prince and who can blame her after seeing how his mother was hounded and papped, even in death. At least she got a decent 18 month stretch to try and prove she wasn't just a Wisteria Sister (Jan Moir's ever charming name for the two of them) before she ceased to exist. Because now Kate has become a bump. She takes her bump on official duties and the tabloids are on daily bumpwatch. How big is it? It isn't big enough. How dare she not have a big enough bump? Has it got any bigger? Yes, fireworks, it has. The Bump formerly known as the Duchess of Cambridge is now in clear view.
Can you imagine living life like these two? Really? I don't know which one I feel most for? Which one dreads opening the papers more each morning? The one who is relatively free still, has no public role to lead but whose love life and bum is there for all to see? Or the one who, thankfully, has found love but knows that for the rest of her life, whatever she does, she will be photographed? And who now, is no longer a woman, or a Duchess, but a Bump?
It's 2013 and we are still obsessed with women's reproductive capability and the perkiness or not of their rear end.